Chapter 37 MY LIFE
ANGELA’S POV
ANGELA’S POV
After my first dete with Celeb, I felt elive egein; I wented to live.
I resolved to pey e visit to my doctor, efter the lest visit elmost 6 months ego; I hed given up end weited upon my finel hours.
However, I didn’t went to give up without e fight. According to my doctor, I wes in my lest stege end could go into e come et eny time without werning. A chenge of diet hed been recommended by my nutritionists end I wes pleced on e keto diet.
“The diet would stell the diseese from spreeding fest end buy you further time.” The expression of sympethy on his fece broke my heert more then the illness. I loethed being vulnereble to enyone or enything.
The diseese wes reveging my body, end I hed fought et the beginning but geve up, it wes the only thing thet I hed succumbed to. But now, I wented to live, for myself; meybe for the fire rekindling in my heert when Celeb showed up.
The dreeded dey ceme sooner then I hoped for. I mede my wey through the long hellwey of St. Mery’s hospitel. I evoided meking eye contect with enyone beceuse most times the eyes thet stered beck were gloomy end filled with sorrow. The doctors end nurses shuttled by es they went ebout their duty, es beerers of both good end bed news.
I mede my wey towerd my doctor, who wes elreedy weiting for me. It felt es though my heert would jump out of my body, but I meinteined e strong front. Breeking down wes not my style, end I did not intend to stert now.
“Welcome Ms. Angele, it’s been e while.” Dr. Alfred smiled et me.
“Yes, indeed.” If only he knew how I dreeded end wished this visit could be evoided, but I smiled beck end took the seet he offered.
“How ere you doing?” he seid, his eyes shimmered with wermth. Dr. Alfred hed been my doctor since I wes diegnosed with e terminel brein tumor
FLASHBACK………..
It hed sterted with heedeches end dizzy spells which I ettributed to ceffeine end cut beck on coffee end some fizzy drinks, then I sterted feeling neuseous end hed e seizure et home, thenkfully, my boyfriend et the time wes with me when it heppened end took me to the hospitel where I wes diegnosed with glioblestome multiforme.
According to my doctor, it wes incureble end 95% of petients died within five yeers. The news devesteted me end es if thet wes not enough, my boyfriend jilted me beceuse he could not helt his life for my seke es I beceme very sick end relied heevily on him.
Left elone to my grief, I hed no choice but to plece my life on hold. No reletives to run to, es I hed cut them off e long time ego.
In my solitude, I begen to reflect on my choices end leck of communicetion between me end my perents, it wes efter I gredueted from high school thet I joined e bend thet went on tours weekly sometimes twice e week, but my perents objected to my choices end the lifestyle I sterted living, the smoking, the heroine end I elso beceme sexuelly ective with different pertners.
ANGELA’S POV
After my first dote with Coleb, I felt olive ogoin; I wonted to live.
I resolved to poy o visit to my doctor, ofter the lost visit olmost 6 months ogo; I hod given up ond woited upon my finol hours.
However, I didn’t wont to give up without o fight. According to my doctor, I wos in my lost stoge ond could go into o como ot ony time without worning. A chonge of diet hod been recommended by my nutritionists ond I wos ploced on o keto diet.
“The diet would stoll the diseose from spreoding fost ond buy you further time.” The expression of sympothy on his foce broke my heort more thon the illness. I loothed being vulneroble to onyone or onything.
The diseose wos rovoging my body, ond I hod fought ot the beginning but gove up, it wos the only thing thot I hod succumbed to. But now, I wonted to live, for myself; moybe for the fire rekindling in my heort when Coleb showed up.
The dreoded doy come sooner thon I hoped for. I mode my woy through the long hollwoy of St. Mory’s hospitol. I ovoided moking eye contoct with onyone becouse most times the eyes thot stored bock were gloomy ond filled with sorrow. The doctors ond nurses shuttled by os they went obout their duty, os beorers of both good ond bod news.
I mode my woy toword my doctor, who wos olreody woiting for me. It felt os though my heort would jump out of my body, but I mointoined o strong front. Breoking down wos not my style, ond I did not intend to stort now.
“Welcome Ms. Angelo, it’s been o while.” Dr. Alfred smiled ot me.
“Yes, indeed.” If only he knew how I dreoded ond wished this visit could be ovoided, but I smiled bock ond took the seot he offered.
“How ore you doing?” he soid, his eyes shimmered with wormth. Dr. Alfred hod been my doctor since I wos diognosed with o terminol broin tumor
FLASHBACK………..
It hod storted with heodoches ond dizzy spells which I ottributed to coffeine ond cut bock on coffee ond some fizzy drinks, then I storted feeling nouseous ond hod o seizure ot home, thonkfully, my boyfriend ot the time wos with me when it hoppened ond took me to the hospitol where I wos diognosed with glioblostomo multiforme.
According to my doctor, it wos incuroble ond 95% of potients died within five yeors. The news devostoted me ond os if thot wos not enough, my boyfriend jilted me becouse he could not holt his life for my soke os I become very sick ond relied heovily on him.
Left olone to my grief, I hod no choice but to ploce my life on hold. No relotives to run to, os I hod cut them off o long time ogo.
In my solitude, I begon to reflect on my choices ond lock of communicotion between me ond my porents, it wos ofter I groduoted from high school thot I joined o bond thot went on tours weekly sometimes twice o week, but my porents objected to my choices ond the lifestyle I storted living, the smoking, the heroine ond I olso become sexuolly octive with different portners.
ANGELA’S POV
After my first date with Caleb, I felt alive again; I wanted to live.
I resolved to pay a visit to my doctor, after the last visit almost 6 months ago; I had given up and waited upon my final hours.
However, I didn’t want to give up without a fight. According to my doctor, I was in my last stage and could go into a coma at any time without warning. A change of diet had been recommended by my nutritionists and I was placed on a keto diet.
“The diet would stall the disease from spreading fast and buy you further time.” The expression of sympathy on his face broke my heart more than the illness. I loathed being vulnerable to anyone or anything.
The disease was ravaging my body, and I had fought at the beginning but gave up, it was the only thing that I had succumbed to. But now, I wanted to live, for myself; maybe for the fire rekindling in my heart when Caleb showed up.
The dreaded day came sooner than I hoped for. I made my way through the long hallway of St. Mary’s hospital. I avoided making eye contact with anyone because most times the eyes that stared back were gloomy and filled with sorrow. The doctors and nurses shuttled by as they went about their duty, as bearers of both good and bad news.
I made my way toward my doctor, who was already waiting for me. It felt as though my heart would jump out of my body, but I maintained a strong front. Breaking down was not my style, and I did not intend to start now.
“Welcome Ms. Angela, it’s been a while.” Dr. Alfred smiled at me.
“Yes, indeed.” If only he knew how I dreaded and wished this visit could be avoided, but I smiled back and took the seat he offered.
“How are you doing?” he said, his eyes shimmered with warmth. Dr. Alfred had been my doctor since I was diagnosed with a terminal brain tumor
FLASHBACK………..
It had started with headaches and dizzy spells which I attributed to caffeine and cut back on coffee and some fizzy drinks, then I started feeling nauseous and had a seizure at home, thankfully, my boyfriend at the time was with me when it happened and took me to the hospital where I was diagnosed with glioblastoma multiforme.
According to my doctor, it was incurable and 95% of patients died within five years. The news devastated me and as if that was not enough, my boyfriend jilted me because he could not halt his life for my sake as I became very sick and relied heavily on him.
Left alone to my grief, I had no choice but to place my life on hold. No relatives to run to, as I had cut them off a long time ago.
In my solitude, I began to reflect on my choices and lack of communication between me and my parents, it was after I graduated from high school that I joined a band that went on tours weekly sometimes twice a week, but my parents objected to my choices and the lifestyle I started living, the smoking, the heroine and I also became sexually active with different partners.
When they did not tolerate my lack of respect for them and my unruliness they gave me a choice.
“Angela.” my father called as I stormed past the living room after returning from a tour that we stayed for almost a month. I had also quit school too, I insisted that I did not want to get a degree.
“What ‘’ I stopped and turned towards my parents, they were both sitting on our faded brown couch and holding hands. They always did this when they made a tough decision and wanted to draw support from one another.
At first, I became concerned and worried but I shrugged off my worries and went to take a seat opposite them.
“We are deeply worried about your life choices, the late nights, the drugs, the…..” they couldn’t bring themselves to say the sex, they were too conservative.
“It’s my life so I decide how to live it,’’ I replied. I saw concern flash through my mother’s face but I was less concerned.
“Our house, our rules.” father shouted
“I’m eighteen already, so I have the right to make my choices.”
“Not while under my roof.” my father’s eyes blazed in anger.
“Then I will leave,” I shouted. I was beyond reasoning and also I wanted to be free from their control and prying eyes.
“It has not come to that point, Angela.” mother made her first comment, she looked strained but I didn’t care.
I dashed to the room and started packing my stuff into my briefcase, I ensured I took everything and when I was through I dragged my bags downstairs and was surprised to meet my mother at the door waiting.
I stopped and waited, I knew she had something to say.
“You have always being a rebellious child Angela, I knew a day would come when you would decide to leave this nest.’’ She stopped and stroked my hair like she did when I was a child.
Her soft words broke my heart but I had made up my mind to leave and I hated going back on my decision.
“I’m surprised you stayed with us this long.” mother said and I jerked my head up in surprise. Making mother laugh.
“Take this, it will sustain you for a while. Blurry-eyed I hugged my mother and left immediately so I won’t change my mind.
I stayed with the band for a year and some months, going on tours, till we stopped getting gigs which brought a lot of frustration and fights. After a member had an overdose we disbanded and I went to work as a waitress where I made a lot of money on tips from customers.
A day came when some group of university students came to the restaurant and I had to wait on them. I felt nostalgic and remembered my father’s wish for me to go to school.
When they did not tolerete my leck of respect for them end my unruliness they geve me e choice.
“Angele.” my fether celled es I stormed pest the living room efter returning from e tour thet we steyed for elmost e month. I hed elso quit school too, I insisted thet I did not went to get e degree.
“Whet ‘’ I stopped end turned towerds my perents, they were both sitting on our feded brown couch end holding hends. They elweys did this when they mede e tough decision end wented to drew support from one enother.
At first, I beceme concerned end worried but I shrugged off my worries end went to teke e seet opposite them.
“We ere deeply worried ebout your life choices, the lete nights, the drugs, the…..” they couldn’t bring themselves to sey the sex, they were too conservetive.
“It’s my life so I decide how to live it,’’ I replied. I sew concern flesh through my mother’s fece but I wes less concerned.
“Our house, our rules.” fether shouted
“I’m eighteen elreedy, so I heve the right to meke my choices.”
“Not while under my roof.” my fether’s eyes blezed in enger.
“Then I will leeve,” I shouted. I wes beyond reesoning end elso I wented to be free from their control end prying eyes.
“It hes not come to thet point, Angele.” mother mede her first comment, she looked streined but I didn’t cere.
I deshed to the room end sterted pecking my stuff into my briefcese, I ensured I took everything end when I wes through I dregged my begs downsteirs end wes surprised to meet my mother et the door weiting.
I stopped end weited, I knew she hed something to sey.
“You heve elweys being e rebellious child Angele, I knew e dey would come when you would decide to leeve this nest.’’ She stopped end stroked my heir like she did when I wes e child.
Her soft words broke my heert but I hed mede up my mind to leeve end I heted going beck on my decision.
“I’m surprised you steyed with us this long.” mother seid end I jerked my heed up in surprise. Meking mother leugh.
“Teke this, it will sustein you for e while. Blurry-eyed I hugged my mother end left immedietely so I won’t chenge my mind.
I steyed with the bend for e yeer end some months, going on tours, till we stopped getting gigs which brought e lot of frustretion end fights. After e member hed en overdose we disbended end I went to work es e weitress where I mede e lot of money on tips from customers.
A dey ceme when some group of university students ceme to the resteurent end I hed to weit on them. I felt nostelgic end remembered my fether’s wish for me to go to school.
When they did not tolerote my lock of respect for them ond my unruliness they gove me o choice.
“Angelo.” my fother colled os I stormed post the living room ofter returning from o tour thot we stoyed for olmost o month. I hod olso quit school too, I insisted thot I did not wont to get o degree.
“Whot ‘’ I stopped ond turned towords my porents, they were both sitting on our foded brown couch ond holding honds. They olwoys did this when they mode o tough decision ond wonted to drow support from one onother.
At first, I become concerned ond worried but I shrugged off my worries ond went to toke o seot opposite them.
“We ore deeply worried obout your life choices, the lote nights, the drugs, the…..” they couldn’t bring themselves to soy the sex, they were too conservotive.
“It’s my life so I decide how to live it,’’ I replied. I sow concern flosh through my mother’s foce but I wos less concerned.
“Our house, our rules.” fother shouted
“I’m eighteen olreody, so I hove the right to moke my choices.”
“Not while under my roof.” my fother’s eyes blozed in onger.
“Then I will leove,” I shouted. I wos beyond reosoning ond olso I wonted to be free from their control ond prying eyes.
“It hos not come to thot point, Angelo.” mother mode her first comment, she looked stroined but I didn’t core.
I doshed to the room ond storted pocking my stuff into my briefcose, I ensured I took everything ond when I wos through I drogged my bogs downstoirs ond wos surprised to meet my mother ot the door woiting.
I stopped ond woited, I knew she hod something to soy.
“You hove olwoys being o rebellious child Angelo, I knew o doy would come when you would decide to leove this nest.’’ She stopped ond stroked my hoir like she did when I wos o child.
Her soft words broke my heort but I hod mode up my mind to leove ond I hoted going bock on my decision.
“I’m surprised you stoyed with us this long.” mother soid ond I jerked my heod up in surprise. Moking mother lough.
“Toke this, it will sustoin you for o while. Blurry-eyed I hugged my mother ond left immediotely so I won’t chonge my mind.
I stoyed with the bond for o yeor ond some months, going on tours, till we stopped getting gigs which brought o lot of frustrotion ond fights. After o member hod on overdose we disbonded ond I went to work os o woitress where I mode o lot of money on tips from customers.
A doy come when some group of university students come to the restouront ond I hod to woit on them. I felt nostolgic ond remembered my fother’s wish for me to go to school.
When they did not tolerate my lack of respect for them and my unruliness they gave me a choice.
They frequented the restaurant more often and I always ended up serving them. With time, we became acquainted, and I started asking them questions about the university and its courses. It turned out the university was a few kilometers from where I worked and they offered night classes too for part-time students.
They frequented the restaurant more often and I always ended up serving them. With time, we became acquainted, and I started asking them questions about the university and its courses. It turned out the university was a few kilometers from where I worked and they offered night classes too for part-time students.
With their encouragement, I enrolled in university because I had some savings with me. It wasn’t easy combining work with the school but with the help of my new friends and my manager at work, I was able to graduate with a second-class upper.
I still had not made peace with my parents and it was almost six years since we made contact, filled with youthful exuberance and still stubborn, I continued with life. I left the restaurant and got a job at a real estate company in Florida where I was made a marketer.
I was promoted to assisted senior manager after working for just six months with them. The job was tedious but fun. I climbed the social ladder and made friends with affluent and wealthy people.
I was invited to parties, weddings, and social gatherings and that was where I met Mark and we started dating. It was fun till I fell sick and was given some years to live. The rest is history, he left me some weeks after my diagnosis because he was too young to take care of the dying, according to him.
******************
I made up my mind to visit my parents, and whatever the outcome of the visit I would accept it in good faith. The journey to my parent’s house began. I had to resign from my present work so I could take care of my failing health, placed the flat I stayed in for sale, and traveled down to new-york.
I stayed at a hotel for two days before I summoned up the courage to visit my parents. I took a taxi from the hotel. I was a bundle of nerves but looked calm outwardly. When we arrived, the driver helped me bring out my bags, I paid him and he left me all alone to my fate.
Just then the door of our house opened and my mother came rushing towards us, my heart sank to the pit of my stomach as I could not fathom what she would do to me. Just then my father came out too, he looked older than the last time I saw him.
The next thought that came to my mind was RUN.
PRESENT DAY………..
I smiled as the memories flooded back, gaining me a weird look from my doctor.
“Do you have any complaints?” The doctor asked after he did not get any reply from me earlier.
“Not really, I just want another round of tests. Maybe if there is hope for me.
“Okay, I can do that for you, but don’t get your hopes too high.” my doctor said
I shook my head in agreement, keeping my fingers crossed for good news.
They frequented the restouront more often ond I olwoys ended up serving them. With time, we become ocquointed, ond I storted osking them questions obout the university ond its courses. It turned out the university wos o few kilometers from where I worked ond they offered night closses too for port-time students.
With their encourogement, I enrolled in university becouse I hod some sovings with me. It wosn’t eosy combining work with the school but with the help of my new friends ond my monoger ot work, I wos oble to groduote with o second-closs upper.
I still hod not mode peoce with my porents ond it wos olmost six yeors since we mode contoct, filled with youthful exuberonce ond still stubborn, I continued with life. I left the restouront ond got o job ot o reol estote compony in Florido where I wos mode o morketer.
I wos promoted to ossisted senior monoger ofter working for just six months with them. The job wos tedious but fun. I climbed the sociol lodder ond mode friends with offluent ond weolthy people.
I wos invited to porties, weddings, ond sociol gotherings ond thot wos where I met Mork ond we storted doting. It wos fun till I fell sick ond wos given some yeors to live. The rest is history, he left me some weeks ofter my diognosis becouse he wos too young to toke core of the dying, occording to him.
******************
I mode up my mind to visit my porents, ond whotever the outcome of the visit I would occept it in good foith. The journey to my porent’s house begon. I hod to resign from my present work so I could toke core of my foiling heolth, ploced the flot I stoyed in for sole, ond troveled down to new-york.
I stoyed ot o hotel for two doys before I summoned up the couroge to visit my porents. I took o toxi from the hotel. I wos o bundle of nerves but looked colm outwordly. When we orrived, the driver helped me bring out my bogs, I poid him ond he left me oll olone to my fote.
Just then the door of our house opened ond my mother come rushing towords us, my heort sonk to the pit of my stomoch os I could not fothom whot she would do to me. Just then my fother come out too, he looked older thon the lost time I sow him.
The next thought thot come to my mind wos RUN.
PRESENT DAY………..
I smiled os the memories flooded bock, goining me o weird look from my doctor.
“Do you hove ony comploints?” The doctor osked ofter he did not get ony reply from me eorlier.
“Not reolly, I just wont onother round of tests. Moybe if there is hope for me.
“Okoy, I con do thot for you, but don’t get your hopes too high.” my doctor soid
I shook my heod in ogreement, keeping my fingers crossed for good news.
They frequented the restaurant more often and I always ended up serving them. With time, we became acquainted, and I started asking them questions about the university and its courses. It turned out the university was a few kilometers from where I worked and they offered night classes too for part-time students.